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Archives for April 2009

Senatorial Humor

by Michele April 30th, 2009 | Humor, Late Night TV
On Tuesday, Senator Arlen Specter decided to change political parties, which made it a popular topic for late night tv.

Craig Ferguson shared his thoughts about this switch,
Hey, did you hear about Arlen Specter, the senator? He left the Republican Party and became a Democrat. What?! It’s very odd, to switch teams like this. Who does he think he is, Lindsay Lohan?

Jay Leno voiced his thoughts also,
And in a move that has stunned Washington, D.C., longtime Pennsylvania Republican Senator Arlen Specter has switched parties. He is the first Republican senator to switch teams since Senator Larry Craig, I guess.
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Vintage News Items

by Jane Wangersky April 29th, 2009 | Humor
"Owing to the overcrowded condition of our columns, a number of births
and deaths are unavoidably postponed this week."

"The picnic this year was not as well attended as it has been
for some years. This can be laid to three causes: the change of
place, deaths in families, and other amusements."

"Last night our town gathered to witness a performance of  Hamlet at the Town Hall. There has been considerable discussion as to whether the play was written by Shakespeare or Bacon. All doubt can be now be settled. Let their graves be opened; the one who turned over last night is the author."
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A Final Piece of Earth Day Humor

by Michele April 28th, 2009 | Humor, Late Night TV
Last week, Jay Leno noted a recent discovery in regards to pollution,
Researchers in Britain announced today that global warming is caused in part by overweight people. They say obese people release more carbon dioxide into the air. No, this is real. This is real. See, all this time you used to think it was caused by coal-burning factories. Turns out it was Cheesecake Factories.

Any chance these researchers were sponsored by ACME Power Company?
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Things I Learned at NASA HQ

by Jane Wangersky April 27th, 2009 | Humor


"Badge” is a verb (as in “badging station”)

“Crawlerway” is not Florida slang for a fast-moving worm, it's the road the “crawler” takes to get the space shuttle to the launch pad, at one mile an hour

“Ice cream of the future” is available at the price of the future – $4.79 before tax

When naming parking lot sections after famous people, it's a good idea to number them, too, especially when the people have names like “Schirra” and “Schweickart”
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    Kids in Disney Country

    by Jane Wangersky April 24th, 2009 | Humor
    Based on an intensive, almost week-long study of one community near Orlando, I've concluded that children in Florida:

    • play with little plastic golf clubs, in little plastic golf bags, that you get at Wal-Mart

    • don't put on sweaters because their mothers feel cold – they turn on ceiling fans because their mothers feel hot

    • are not allowed to go out wearing pants that come past their knees

    • think people who commute through blizzards are “lucky, because you get to see snow”

    • get hurricane days instead of snow days, but don't seem to look forward to them for some reason.

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